Disclaimer: This is by far the longest post I’ve written to date. My desire is to be clear and comprehensive in my treatment of this topic. As a blogger, writer, and teacher, it is my sincere desire that Christians would have a more amiable, biblical, and wholesome approach to the discussion of ideas and the proclamation of truth through online platforms.
I love a good debate. Grappling with difficult theological and philosophical topics through open dialogue helps me to recognize flaws in my own thinking. More importantly, it helps me to come to stronger conclusions as I interact with other thinkers.
For example, I recently had a healthy discussion with Bro. Houk, the chairman of our Bible program at West Coast Baptist College. This discussion took place over lunch. Although we grappled with hard questions (more like I asked the questions and let him tell me his thoughts), the conversation was amiable and quite rewarding.
While such debates have long taken place in public settings and in person, they have now moved to the online platform. I know this is stating the obvious and I recognize this has been the case for years now. I’ve only had this blog for a number of months, but within those months I have found that social platforms and blogs can be unforgiving if one does not commit to a set of ethics and etiquette.
While some would say that we ought not to engage and let the social media activists waste their own time, I think ministry leaders need to consider the fact that this IS the new platform where ideas are shared. Moreover, it is a place where bad ideas are perpetuated if not challenged. I recently saw a statistic stating that 70% of American adults use Facebook daily. Additionally, 80% of millennials and 90% of teens use social media in some form daily.
There is potential for profound influence on social media. TED’s slogan states there are “ideas worth sharing,” but I believe there are also bad ideas worth challenging or refuting. Ministry leaders and those of us with the Gospel of Christ should take seriously the potential of these platforms for presenting the truth of God. In many ways, this is the platform where we must be ready to “give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you.”
How do we engage in helpful dialogue without condescending to the level of immature squabble? How do we engage on a public platform with grace and a spirit of collaboration for the cause of Christ? In this post, I want to suggest some “nethics and netiquette.”
1. Follow biblical principles of communication.
Communication, whether spoken or written, should always be dictated by the principles of the Bible. This point alone could solve a great deal of unspiritual squabble found on the Internet. The Bible shares some important insight about our conversation and dialogue among Christians.
Our first desire in our communication is that it would please God. So often we’re tempted to comment, reply, or even lash out at others on social media. Such behavior reveals only a lack of self-control and a heightened concern for one’s self. There’s no Bible verse that justifies a mean spirit, name-calling, or otherwise rude conversation.
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer. –Psalm 19:14
Secondly, recognize that we will give account for every word we utter. We only have so much time and so many words we can say in this lifetime. Do we really wish to leave a novel of hate, judgment, and shameful speech?
But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.–Matthew 12:36
Thirdly, use only that speech that is full of grace and tasteful to the hearer. While some would argue that we are to “declare aloud” and many Christian activists find it more appealing to simply yell, scream, and picket “truth,” the Bible teaches that our speech ought to be tasteful and full of God’s love and grace. Specifically, the Bible says that this will help us to know how we ought to answer. The goal is not to win an argument; the goal is to win a soul (or in the context of this post, to win a brother).
Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. –Colossians 4:6
Finally, our speech and communication ought to always have edification and encouragement as its goal. When we fail to speak in a way that is edifying, we grieve the Holy Spirit. More importantly, when we lack grace and kindness toward each other, we fail to demonstrate God’s love and forgiveness to those around us.
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. –Ephesians 4:29-32
2. Follow biblical principles of correction.
A growing problem in online platforms is the approach Christians take in “correcting” other Christians. I often hear the reasoning, “Any public issue requires a public reprimand.” Those who reason thus usually do so to justify their rebuking of other Christians without ever speaking to the person directly.
I do believe there is a time and a place for public rebuke and separation from those who walk unruly. The Apostle Paul gave a clear demonstration of this in his epistles (remember Demus?). I don’t think you could support biblically, however, that Demus didn’t see it coming. There’s something clearly wrong about publicly rebuking another Christian without having heard or experienced first hand what it is you are correcting.
He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him. –Proverbs 18:13
So what would be the biblical principles of correction? I believe the Lord Jesus lays these out plainly in Matthew 18.
Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.–Matthew 18:15-17
Too many Christians want to bring their issues straight to the church without first establishing the problems personally and in the mouth of witnesses. No one, no matter their position, accomplishments, or pedigree, has such perfect insight into a situation.
3. Follow a basic code of conduct online.
How can the aforementioned principles be practiced with grace on an online platform? How can we graciously, lovingly, courageously, and boldly strengthen good ideas and refute bad ones in an online setting?
This list is definitely original (sorry, no proof texts), but these are some ways I believe Christians can improve our discussions online.
Treat your blog or website as a dialogue, not as inspired Scripture.
By this I mean recognize from the beginning that you might be wrong and be willing to grapple with those who challenge your ideas and opinions. How?
- If you post online, provide your readers with contact information. To hide contact info and disallow comments reveals either cowardice or pride.
- Respond to those who question your ideas is an amiable and humble way. Remember, scrutiny and other perspectives can go a long way in strengthening our convictions, whether by revealing flaws or weaknesses or confirming logic.
- Never say to anyone online what you would never say in person.
Always try to assume the best motives from those you read.
The most absurd bloggers and opinion posts are those that assume to understand the motives behind the one they criticize. If you haven’t picked up the phone and sincerely sought to understand that person’s motives, why should we believe that you have such God-like insight to know and judge the heart of another Christian?
- Before publicly rebuking or correcting a fellow Christian, take the time to contact them through the channels provided.
- Sincerely ask your questions and raise your concerns, then sincerely listen and seek to understand before trying to be understood. Remember, your the one judging their motives, not the other way around.
- Be willing to apologize if you’re wrong, and cordially disagree if you find your assumptions to be true.
In matters of Bible truth, stand firm in the faith. In matters of preference, give grace and submit the judging of all things to God.
In matters of clear, unashamed biblical heresy, our biblical mandate is clear:
Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine.–2 Timothy 4:2
In matters pertaining to preferences, cultural norms, and subjective opinions, focus on following the Holy Spirit’s leading in your own life and ministry. If you believe someone is sincere but sincerely wrong, is it that hard to leave it up to God to judge all things? I think our biblical mandate is equally clear on this matter:
Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.–Galatians 6:7
When correcting matters of truth, focus on the truth, not the person.
If I feel that a family member of mine is heading a wrong direction; more importantly, if I feel a brother is headed toward danger and destruction, do I stand by and quietly warn all the other brothers? No. I call out to the brother and endeavor to warn him of the danger.
Too often in our blogs and opinions, we seem to think it is necessary to name names and point fingers. Here’s a question: do you believe in the power of truth? Do you believe that the Holy Spirit can use truth to shed light on falsity?
Or do you believe that people need your unique insight and clear accusations to reveal the falsities of another brother?
I believe in the power of truth. I also believe that the only reason lies and falsities are perpetuated is because we’re too busy pointing fingers at others instead of pointing our fingers to the Bible and allowing the Holy Spirit to use His truth to guide the church in the way they ought to go. Our fingers should point only to the Bible and to Christ. Only then will every imposter and counterfeit be clearly seen.
I hope the spirit of this article is clearly one that desires greater unity, greater dispersion of truth, and greater collaboration between Christians. We have a great task of reaching the world with the Gospel of Christ. Good ideas and strong biblical truth are needed, so let’s not waste our time picking fights and flaunting our own sinful, prideful flesh.
